The Spoonbill Generator

Recycling Genesis

In the beginning Bob created the woman and the beer [N]

And the woman was without form and the beer was weak [F]

And sorrow was upon the face of the man. [N]

And Bob said "It's not good for me to continue without premium beer." [Karin]

And there was premium beer. [N]

And that was the first day. And Bob saith: "Not so good." [F]

On the second day Bob created the pizza and the couch [Beefy ]

And the pizza was lukewarm and the couch was too hard [D]

And anger was upon the face of the man [Beefy ]

And Bob said "Let there be goose down and flaming brick ovens." [Dassn't Say]

And thus Bob had a soft couch and hot pizza [Karin]

And Bob sat on one and ate the other, and saw that it was good [Beefy ]

On the third day Bob created Cable Sports TV [N]

And the transmission was fuzzy with commercials on the face of the screen [F]

And frustration was upon the face of the man [N]

And Bob was full of wrath and slew a third of the halfbacks [F]

And the networks were forced to comply [N]

And Bob observed the coachs' discomfiture and it was good. [F]

On the fourth day Bob slept till about 5 pm [N]

And the bed was soft and comforting and silence reigned [F]

And bliss was upon the face of the man [N]

And Bob awoke and said "Let there be light sabres" [Beefy ]

And thus George Lucas was made a very rich man [N]

And Bob observed the Star Wars franchise and pronounced it so so. [Dassn't Say]

On the fourth day Bob created Playboy [N]

And there was a shout of joy in the locker room and much leering [F]

And drool was upon the face of the men [N]

And Bob smirked and said unto Himself: "What pigs." [F]

And he realised it was actually the fifth day [N]

And he said: "Let there be time zones." [F]

On the sixth day Bob created the gadget and the gizmo [Kansas Sam]

And the whatchamacallit and thingamajig, the doohickey and thingamabob [F]

And glee was upon the face of the man [Karin]

And Bob said "Now let there be a remote control" [N]

And there was much channel surfing and internecine warfare [F]

And Bob observed the living room, and thought "What have I done?" [N]

On the seventh day Bob looked around, aghast [F]

And the world was without form and chaos abounded [Beefy ]

And fear was upon the face of the man [Padfoot]

And Bob said "Let's face it, it wasn't much to begin with" [Beefy ]

And it came to pass that Bob turned over a new leaf [Padfoot]

With his helpmeet Eve the Whoopie Doll and oh it was good [Dassn't Say]

Envoi: [Beefy ]

The woman was annoyed all Bob had wrought [Kansas Sam]

He had made it all: but what had he bought? [fester]

And who'd clean this mess? - not Slob Bob, though he ought! [Kansas Sam]

[Anon.]

[Anon.]


Contributors: N, F, Karin, Beefy, D, Dassn't Say, Kansas Sam, Padfoot, fester, Anon.
Poem finished: 14th November 2003 by Anon.