An Entropic Encroachment
As we waited for the bus to mow the wicked postman down
I started to imagine he'd already fled the town
The trap we'd set had seemed to us so certain to succeed
His sudden disappearance now seemed very rum indeed
We'll have to send a posse out to scour round all the bars
And go down to the docks to quiz the many canny tars
That specialise in acts so gross they mostly lack a name
But they'll help us catch the postman for they know that he's to blame
It all began last August, when the second letter came
Containing the instructions: when to strike, and whom to maim
The postman had prepared a shelf of evil-looking jars
That rivalled in their odium those chutneys of Mama's
We knew we had to stop him - we just couldn't let him breed!
For fear of what might blossom from such blue-blood Royal-Mail seed
We sent for an exterminator, one of great renown
Who came with flashing eyes and a wildly flowing gown!
He came with whetstone gleaming, he came with blades to spare
And great the ululation when we saw his flowing hair
But once the ghastly deed was done, we sang another tune
We lacked the inner fortitude to harvest what we'd hewn
And as we waited for that 'bus, our consciences ablaze
We realised the postman's plot had numbered all our days
from zero up, in incremental steps of seventeen
And when the deed was done, we murmured "Heav'n preserve the Queen!"
| Contributors: | P, Roland, TG, Bop. |
| Poem finished: | 23rd March 1999. |