Hugo Onerous (Episode1)
Where, oh where is the Phantom Menace
Who writhes while falling into the abyss
He surely can't be playing tennis
For I know where his racket is
We seek him here, we seek him there
He needs some shoes, I have a pair
A tracksuit and some underwear
And a headband for his floppy hair
He was seen last in Nova Scotia
Selling a Serbian holiday brochure
- I'm pretty sure it isn't kosher
To kiss the dentist, and then the grocer.
Someone witnessed his defection
And pointed out he needs correction
Angry at this imperfection
He stormed the Presidentialection
He crossed the globe from pole to pole
With faster feet than Andy Cole
His candidature to enroll
On the side of a Dover sole
Such a form he he submit
To confirm his laughing spit
Which couldn't hide his lack of wit
Or need for mummy's sagging tit
They do not seek him anywhere
And yet he knows he should beware
Lest worry should erode his hair
And thus erode his savoir faire
All things erode down to fine powder
Including pre-packaged clam chowder
But as for the Menace, he just became louder!
One can here him as far as the limits of outer!
Does he exist, the Phantom M?
He does exist, but only in shadows dim
Distinguished by the sound of phlegm
Where drips of death evelope him.
| Contributors: | El Tel, Spawn of Rippy, TG, Grayman, caro, P, loop, The Agent Apsley, Teresa Incognita, Del Playa Debaucher, Lady Lillian. |
| Poem finished: | 6th September 1999. |