The Spoonbill Generator

Cover me with asphalt as they do in Donegal! [The Agent Apsley]

I feel the need for my concrete round my spine. [KT]

My nervous system never seems to function in the cold [TG]

But while I am a motorway, I promise not to whine [P]

Norr link the mighty Tamar to the Tyne [Roland]

Smother me with curry as they will in Bangalore! [Grayman]

Reinforce my gizzard with your sauce. [Roland]

My vertebrae need heating with a touch of molten gold [TG]

Before immersion in the second course [Grayman]

Of mastery of Double Dutch and Norse. [The Agent Apsley]

Dunk me in the Hellespont as they did in ancient times [P]

Like Byron I would feel the Grecian seas [KT]

And revel in the tempests as they rolled [The Agent Apsley]

Though risking that I might contract some topical disease [TG]

Dividing up my old navel from my knees [Roland]

Roll me in a barrel from the icy Pyrenees [The Agent Apsley]

Tie me to an elephant's behind [TG]

Smear me in goat's yogurt till Jack Straw falls on his knees [E Greejius]

And begs me yet again to change my mind [P]

And write him a new poem of some kind. [KT]