The Spoonbill Generator

The Dismembered Thumbs

Before taking part in this scandalous hoax [Roland]

Allow me to tell you just one of my jokes: [The Agent Apsley]

"My wife has run off with a grizzly bear ... [Roland]

Not unlike me, but with slightly more hair... [Grayman]

Now each time I look in the mirror, I see [Roland]

That I am the bare and the bear is like me." [KT]

Ascending a ladder all covered with cheese [The Agent Apsley]

Is harder than skating on custard and peas [KT]

But only if you have the nerve of a Swede [The Agent Apsley]

And a Viking's capacity for mead [KT]

When all's said and done, you can hardly deny [TG]

That no grizzly bear could be braver than I. [KT]

I wonder if smallpox is caught by the pard [The Agent Apsley]

Or might it be better to buy by the yard? [KT]

I like my diseases to come a la carte [TG]

Ferried in from Dublin on the line that they call DART [The Agent Apsley]

Then when I regard all my pustules and warts [TG]

I file them according to their diff'rent sorts. [KT]

The art of the poet is hard to define [The Agent Apsley]

But you can add your line and I'll add mine [David Rippner]

Together we'll show what a combine can do [KT]

To ogre-like mortals who live in the zoo [The Agent Apsley]

And when we sit back and examine our work [Grayman]

We find it a task that we hastily shirk. [The Agent Apsley]


Contributors: Roland, The Agent Apsley, Grayman, KT, TG, David Rippner.
Poem finished: 11th March 2000.