The Spoonbill Generator

Felicity Kendall's Lovely Armpits

When you said you were my friend [E Greejius]

I was in need of solace; [ripski]

Any port in a storm, they say: [E Greejius]

Not so in Copenhagen! [Apsley]

One for all, but none for one [E Greejius]

I never found my mettle [TG]

A circle drawn around the globe [ripski]

Gets stuck in Copenhagen! [Hamish]

And when you said 'Two's company' [Roland]

I never realised that you were [fester]

Entirely mummified in fur [Apsley]

Last seen in Copenhagen! [TG]

Once for all, I'll say it twice [Rolsnd]

I'm always finding weevils [fester]

In the nephew of my niece [Apsley]

Mermaid of Copenhagen! [fester]

And when you said "We two are one" [Madge]

I had no thought to doubt you [P]

I drank six litres of red wine [fester]

And half a pint of turps as well [Apsley]

I came to in the hospital [fester]

And sprayed you with a wine divine [Apsley]

Thank God that I am here and not [fester]

In Northern Scotland, on a boat [Apsley]

Nor yet in Copenhagen! [TG]

When Moses took me by the hand [Apsley]

I never thought to question [TG]

I told the players in the band [rippinski]

"Beware of Copenhagen!" [fester]

They heeded not my sound advice [Apsley]

"We're not scared of pickled herring!" [fester]

They played as if the world would end [TG]

In fifty-seven minutes [Grayman]

Or maybe, even, fifty-eight, [Apsley]

But Ragnarok has not yet come [fester]

To end the torment of the dead [Apsley]

Tortured souls who forever dwell [fester]

Within the sound of many a bell [Apsley]

Still listening for the song of hope [TG]

And washing with a piece of grass [Apsley]

I knelt beside the unicorn [TG]

And melted it into a piece [Apsley]

So as we near our journey's end [TG]

May time from us all ill forfend [Apsley]


Contributors: E Greejius, ripski, Apsley, TG, Hamish, Roland, fester, Rolsnd, Madge, P, rippinski, Grayman.
Poem finished: 24th April 2000.