The Spoonbill Generator

My French Bananas Of Unbounded Magnificence

When teaching Granny to suck eggs [Hamish]

The dusky maiden softly begs [Apsley]

The husky crone to lift a hand [dkb]

And helps the wrinkled hag to stand [fester]

Where moth and mildew cannot reach [Apsley]

Ties her in place, and starts to teach [festyr]

With many cries of "Stand up straight!" [dkb]

"Now put it in your mouth, like so - [fester]

And must I tell you: suck, don't blow!" [dkb]

But Granny blew and eggy mess [fester]

Besmirched the helpful maiden's dress [dkb]

Who then delivered such a slap [fester]

That Gran responded "Shut your trap!" [dkb]

And tried to slap the maiden back [fester]

Her aged joints went crick and crack [dkb]

The ropes held tight; the maiden smiled, [fester]

The crone could only curse the child; [dkb]

The evil girl now took her switch [Hamish]

But luckily, a sudden glitch [dkb]

Occurred to stop her beating Gran [Hamish]

She beat the egg instead, /enfin/. [dkb]


Contributors: Hamish, Apsley, dkb, fester, festyr.
Poem finished: 17th May 2000.