The Spoonbill Generator

If my ardour flickers [Roland]

Then (like other de-frocked vicars) [Hamish]

I shall soon remove my hat, [dkb]

And ascend Mount Ararat [Roland]

Where I will be passionate [Hamish]

In borrowed crimson knickers [Roland]

If my courage dampens [Hamish]

As I'm driving in my crampons [Roland]

I'll use elevator shoes [Hamish]

Take a modest nip of booze [dkb]

Than which there's none so consummate [Apsley]

As a drop of Speckled Hen's [Hamish]

When mine heartbeat falters [Roland]

As I'm driving in my Skoda [Hamish]

When the pattern alters [Roland]

I hope that I'll be sober [Hamish]

Unlike the surly reprobate [Apsley]

Who's just a damn free-loader [Hamish]

When my conscience wavers [Apsley]

As I'm stealing someone's Quavers [ellie]

I always try to hold my breath [P]

SuperEgo's gone - bereft! [chris]

Still I might appropriate [Roland]

A nice electric shaver [ellie]

Should my passions fail me [Hamish]

Then I hope a cat will flay me [ellie]

And when he's put in jail he [fester]

Will tell his tale politely. [Apsley]

Now the spoon bill will fly [Anon.]

Hello now we are free so help me [Anon.]

Should some person end this [Apsley]

He'll soon be far from friendless [TG]

Because my manner is tyrannical [Apsley]

As befits a rude mechanical [TG]

Clothed in rags and oily tatters [Apsley]

Of mummy's pretty red dress [Hamish]