The Spoonbill Generator

Our Ugliest Newly-Weds Disgust Me

A feast of fumes, a feast of fumes [Roland]

What kind of beast this feast consumes? [fester]

What torpid tongue, what lazy lung [Roland]

With scabrous, wheezing, maggot young [fester]

Lurks, choking, in these rooms? [Roland]

What creature vile, what cankered brute [fester]

Lies drinking in subaqua gear? [Apsley]

A bandicoot? [loaf]

No bandicoot has lobster shell [Hamish]

It wouldn't wear it half as well [Grayman]

As this huge monster, so ugly [Hamish]

Which suits itself so snugly [loaf]

And doesn't mind the smell [Grayman]

A fist of fire, a fist of fire [Roland]

What awful tryst this fist desires? [fester]

What vorpal blade its husk pursues? [Apsley]

I wonder where I put me shoes? [Anon.]

The frabjous lair in sylvan wise [Apsley]

Lay soft awaiting cakes to rise [Mattus Rattus]

Where no man since has ventured forth [Apsley]

- The home of Reggie B, of course! [Anon.]


Contributors: Roland, fester, Apsley, loaf, Hamish, Grayman, Anon., Mattus Rattus.
Poem finished: 12th June 2000.