The Duplicitous Dumpling
'Cusp' she spelt without a 'K'
For Kafka was her bitter bane
& caused her endless grinding pain
That never never went away
But lingered in her nether zones
Where man nor beast could spy it out
In sinew, synapse, nor in bones
(Despite a host of shady loans)
It lingered; such is gout.
She was an ageing beauty queen
Midwinter was her Waterloo
When she would haunt the frozen zoo
Enswathed in plasticene
That had been purchased on a spree
With neither credit-card nor cash
Nor cup of tea too icily
Remaindered; all quite free.
Her middle name rhymed with jam
And all her others with 'perhaps'
(Which made her very fond of baps)
And, when in Amsterdam
(The self-styled Ipswich of the East)
She'd marinate her clogs
Inside some spindly logs,
A somewhat charmless feast
Fit but for the sweetest showers
And fortified agin all drought
(As Chaucer very fondly thought)
She'd while away the hours
In knitting match-sticks out of slime:
She'd while away the weeks
Until the serried hands of Time
Daub their charcoal 'pon her cheeks
Kafka came at dawn to fetch the rent:
Yet by the evening every sou was spent.
Contributors: | Surlaw, Apsley. |
Poem finished: | 7th October 2001. |