The Spoonbill Generator

Jemima was a nurse-maid. [Apsley]

Nothing on her mind [Surlaw]

But the darning, and the cook. [Apsley]

Whose contract, still unsigned, [Surlaw]

Was the hand that she had played - [Apsley]

To leave the burning bridge behind [Surlaw]

And, on it, cast no final look: [Apsley]

When she heard the curse made [Surlaw]

The cook was by the fire, [Apsley]

Patching pale-blue socks with red [Surlaw]

For pie-bald-style attire [Apsley]

Was the price that must be paid [Surlaw]

For burning down the byre [Apsley]

Whence all but she had all but fled [Surlaw]

The cook shot out a piercing glance [Apsley]

To bid Jemima to the dance [Surlaw]

Jemima was not willing [Apsley]

Nothing on her mind [Surlaw]

To entertain nor even brook [Apsley]

Another daily grind [Surlaw]

Another round of swilling [Apsley]

The blind leading the blind [(trad)]

Or so it says in the Book [Apsley]

So ... when she'd made the killing [Surlaw]

The cook was at the pump [Apsley]

And every syllable they said [Surlaw]

Was scratched upon the sump:- [Apsley]

From which, while it was spilling, [Surlaw]

Retched forth a sodden lump [Apsley]

And danced with that instead [Surlaw]

The cook performed a nimble step [Apsley]

Jemima off her feet was swep' [Surlaw]

She tumbled lamely in a heap [Apsley]

Of laundry, stale and dank [Surlaw]

That smelt of moths and garden boots [Apsley]

And codfish ripe and rank [Surlaw]

The tea the cook began to steep [Apsley]

Would rust right through the tank [Surlaw]

And pollute the frozen brook [Apsley]

Thus those who banned a crippled creep [Surlaw]

May soon repent and start to weep [Apsley]