The Spoonbill Generator

Now, hearken, I'll tell you the tale [asdf (from Beefy)]

(It will make you turn ghostly and pale) [P]

A quest for a thing [Kansas Sam]

(No, it wasn't a ring) [P]

"Holy Lancelot, Batman!": The Grail [Kansas Sam]

At the court of King Arthur they learned
Of a mythical prize to be earned [Nym]

So Batman told Robin,
"Quick! Off to Bat-jobbin'!" [Kansas Sam (2)]

"No stone will we leave unturned." [Karin]

Merlin was grave, for the dangers were rife [Nym]

"Seeketh the grail and risketh thy life!" [Karin]

But they heeded him not
And came up with a plot [Nym]

That involved old King Arthur's young wife [Randy]

For now that her hubby was dead
She hung out with 'Lancy' instead [Nym]

She was quite the harlot [Francine]

Or so said her varlet [Karin]

And he was the one made her bed [Francine]

But Batman and Robin they needed a knight [N]

So they asked Guinevere, "If you might--" [Francine]

"Help out with our scheme" [Nym]

"Our impossible dream" [F]

Guinevere said "oh go fly a kite" [Randy]

And so Batman and Robin withdrew [Francine]

They knew then what they had to do [Anon.]

Call up Lancelot [F]

Who drops his pants a lot [Randy]

And hope that he wasn't too blue [Francine]

When Lancelot finally got dressed [Ms. anon]

His pants were up and nicely pressed [Randy]

He shouted "To horse!" [Beefy]

I shall a divorce [baoloa]

Seek at once - it's all for the best [Beefy]

The Dynamic Duo now sought [Karin]

To leave the Arthurian court [Beefy]

By the door to the moat [P]

(Where they parked the Bat Boat) [Kansas Sam]

'gainst Lance & Gawain they then fought. [Karin]

There were batarangs clashing with swords [N]

The winners would reap the rewards [td]

They fought through the night [N]

And when it was light [Karin]

The bodies were piled up in hordes [N]

Then it was that Batman raised [Karin]

His body was battered and grazed [N]

He cried, "I'm not done!" [F]

Lance pulled out a gun [N]

The medievalists all were amazed [F]

"One twitch of your cape, and I'll fire!" [N]

"Holy round table!" cried Robin. A squire-- [F]

Brought news from the King [Beefy]

Of that not-a-ring thing [Kansas Sam]

That he want the pair to acquire [P]

"Why don't we team up?" Robin cried [Beefy]

"Yes, that's it!", Batman said to his bride [Kansas Sam]

A pact was soon sealed [Beefy]

To divide up the field [Kansas Sam]

And they feasted on food that was fried [archaeopteryx]

"So where should our searching commence?" [Beefy]

"Well, I guess I'll put in my two pence" [archaeopteryx]

"Let's start near that sign" [Anon.]

"For chalice divine" [archaeopteryx]

"Then, leave us depart and go hence!" [Evan]

At last did our heroes prevail [Karin]

They boarded a ship and set sail [Anon.]

But in Homeric fashion [anon]

And sidetracked by passion [Karin]

They rammed right into a whale! [Robert]

The whale was quite angry, of course [Francine]

It was dining on plankton and sauce [N]

As its meal was upturned [Karin]

It was miffed and concerned [td]

And raged with consid'rable force [N]

So Batman whispered to Robin [baoloa]

"Just look how this creature is sobbin'--" [N]

We should take our hankies [baoloa]

And several perjankies [F]

If only this boat would stop bobbin' [N]

When at last the waves did abate [Karin]

The whale looked down at his plate [Anon.]

But sadly he saw
His meal was no more [Nym (2)]

So our heroes he commenced to berate. [Karin]

"Just watch where you're going, you fools!" [N]

"Even seafaring grail quests have rules" [Karin]

Said this whale with a glare [Robert Commerford]

Then he told them where [baoloa]

The fish go to find the best schools [TG]

So Robin did ask what they taught [Anon.]

(forgetting about the grail he most sought) [Robert]

The whale seem pained
But then he explained [N]

That lecturing there was naught [baoloa]

"What use is a school with no classes?" [N]

"Where pupils just sit on their... benches?" [Grayman]

That's all he would say [Beefy]

He then went away [archaeopteryx]

With our heroes left flat on their asses [Beefy]