The Spoonbill Generator

The store was stocked with many things
From cheese to hats and diamond rings [N]

But it was in the toothpaste aisle [Kansas Sam]

Where I first saw my dream man's smile. [Karin]

"Crest", I saw, must be his brand [Anon.]

Wait--denture cleaner in his hand? [Francine]

Embarassed, he: "My crown fell out [Anon.]

And landed in my sauerkraut" [N]

How cute, I thought, a raconteur [Francine]

This might be just the man, for sure [N]

I wonder, Is he gay or married? [Francine]

And studied all the things he carried [N]

A shoehorn and a box of douche [Francine]

Some ointment for his precious tush [Anon.]

A card that read: My Dearest Mom [Francine]

A chastity belt for his daughter's prom. [Dassn't Say]

I was confused. What was his yen? [Francine]

Was I his Barbie, he my Ken? [Kansas Sam]

Or was I Curly, he my Moe? [Francine]

That Mom of his--I bet she'd know [Anon.]

Perhaps the card was for his dad [Francine]

But surely not that belt he had [Kansas Sam]

He piqued my interest, that he did [Francine]

And then I met his snot-nosed kid. [Karin]

My dream collapsed; ah, just as well [Francine]

In fact, he emitted quite a smell [Karin]

Sniffling, sighing, I hurriedly left [F]

It seems I will remain bereft [N]