The Spoonbill Generator

Billy Mays here, Folks, to tell you about an incredible new product: [Kansas Sam]

Oxy-Air - an actual, breathable mix of oxygen, nitrogen and other trace elements [Karin]

Available in a can, a canister, or pumped straight into your home [Beefy]

Oxy-Air is not yet available in stores, so call now! But wait, there's more! [Karin]

We're also gonna include Oxy-Carbon, a blanket of gas to warm your entire planet [Kansas Sam]

Are you irritated by unwanted ozone? Oxy-Carbonate it! [dok]

If the polar icecaps don't start receding, we'll give you a full refund. [Karin]

Our prices are insane! So buy now, while stocks last. [dok]

Tire of dirty air?--we'll even throw in the Super Chamois. Call now! [Kansas Sam]