The Spoonbill Generator

My Least Best Failing

The restrooms here are fairly clean [F]

And let me tell you why [Padfoot]

They have a new-fangled machine [Beefy ]

That (to the naked eye) [Ethetran]

Looks far too clean to try [loaf]

It has a button labelled "press" [Ethetran]

And let me tell you this [Beefy ]

I found it caused extreme distress [Ethetran]

And made it hard to piss [Beefy ]

But at least I didn't miss [Ethetran]

The second I'd done up my fly [Beefy ]

I knew I was a guy [F]

The moment I was back outside [Roland]

I took a look around [F]

A bridegroom and a blushing bride [loaf]

Were rolling on the ground [F]

Athwart my burial mound [Roland]

I tried to turn away, but then [TG]

Recalled my wedding night [F]

And heard her stolid snore again [Kansas Sam]

Which caused me to take flight [F]

Yet no wind for my kite [Kansas Sam]

The second I'd upswept my hair [F]

I knew I didn't care [Beefy ]

I tried to turn away, and now [Roland]

I rather lost control [Grayman]

I'm really not quite certain how [Ethetran]

I learned to "Rock 'n' Roll" [Beefy ]

Much less to stop and stroll [Kansas Sam]

And so, without a safety-net [Roland]

I'm walking a fine line [Grayman]

I think it's time we made a bet [F]

And sealed our pact with wine [Beefy ]

That would be so divine [F]

The second I'd eaten the pie [Padfoot]

I knew I soon would barf [F]

The restrooms here are fairly clean [Beefy ]

I have forgotten why [F]

But after all the sights I've seen [Ethetran]

I've given up the Windowlene [Grayman]

I'll stick to Scotch and Rye [Beefy ]

And so, with drink and potty picked, [Kansas Sam]

I think I'll flit away [F]

I think this poem's finished [Beefy]


Contributors: F, Padfoot, Beefy, Ethetran, loaf, Roland, TG, Kansas Sam, Grayman.
Poem finished: 8th October 2003 by Anon..