Pay Cash For Everything Except Unguents
Late Christmas Eve the lot was dark, and so I filched a tree
I wrapped it well, but found I couldn't fit it in a stocking
I tied it up with strong, thick rope and strapped it to my back
(It's not so hard to carry, after you've acquired the knack)
But after half a mile my knees began a-knocking
And so, I parked it near a pub, and ducked inside for tea
The landlord bade me welcome there, and drew a pint of mild
But after several, sad to say, I became quite wild
On Christmas morning I awoke and found myself in clink
And forthwith phoned my barrister who refused to take my call
I tried to charm the sergeant but he laughed and turned away
(And yes, I languished in that cell for an entire day)
As Christmas night fell and the moonlight lit the wall
I realized, as I thunk my thoughts, less tree and yuletide drink,
Less madcap revelries, less of almost everything
Woud serve to give the Christmastide its peaceful, festive ring
Envoi
If Christmas comes but once a year, what lessons should we learn?
Maybe all the other prophets ought to get a turn?
Contributors: | Kansas Sam, Ethetran, Big Andy, Beefy, F, Roland. |
Poem finished: | 29th December 2003 by Kansas Sam. |