The Spoonbill Generator

All is quiet; my morning cup of tea is steaming in my hands [(trad)]

I put it quickly down, and open up the news [Beefy ]

Will the Red Terror Gang accede to the demands [loaf]

What about this war over obsolete sands [jm]

I then saw an offer too good to refuse [Beefy ]

"White elephant shaped wicker bathroom, with lid: for just £10" [Ethetran]

I know it must be mine, and I mean now [Big Andy]

Could this deal possibly be as good as it sounds? [Karin]

What about the rumour that's doing the rounds [Beefy ]

That it really is just the ear of a sow? [F]