The Spoonbill Generator

Market Anomalies Perpetrated By Emily Dickens

Because I could not stop for Lunch       [Kevin Andrew Murphy ]

It kindly stopped for me       [loaf ]

The roach coach served Hawaiian Punch       [Kevin Andrew Murphy ]

I went to the lava-toree       [Helen Owly ]

And those for whom the ball-jar sounds       [loaf ]

Shall hear it roar 'Begone,       [Apsley ]

'Til you have fought eleven rounds       [loaf ]

With layabouts, not one,       [Apsley ]

But half-a-dozen, tightly knit       [loaf ]

And skirmishing withal,       [Apsley ]

Anent the brink of some deep pit       [loaf ]

Into the which you'll fall'       [Apsley ]

Because I could not stop for Lunch       [(trad) ]

I ordered meals on wheels       [Nym ]

And, as there was no time to munch       [loaf ]

I shopped for higher heels       [Arnold the Sly Ape ]

And tottered doen the higher path       [Chevalier ]

In bitch boot fetish wear       [Kevin Andrew Murphy ]

Like all the citizens of Bath       [loaf ]

Who air their derrière(s)       [Helen Owly ]

But when I'd gotten to the club       [Kevin Andrew Murphy ]

Along the Royal Mile       [loaf ]

Bill Shakespeare whispered, "That's the rub"       [Kansas Sam ]

And Kafka wrecked my Trial       [loaf ]

Because I could not stop for Lunch       [Kansas Sam, from KAM ]

I stopped for Breakfast; then       [loaf ]

Like Quasimodo, I'd a hunch       [Kevin Andrew Murphy ]

That I might go in Seine       [loaf ]

And donned my natal birthday suit       [Helen Owly ]

With matching boots and cap       [loaf ]

I must admit, I did look cute       [Chevalier ]

And suffered no mishap       [loaf ]

Until I reached again the shore       [Chevalier ]

a gauche, if not a droite       [a priori ]

When, with a mighty echoing roar,       [Chevalier ]

I fetched up in a boîte       [Apsley ]

Because I could not stop for Lunch       [(trad) ]

I dined upon my yacht       [Apsley ]

Surrounded by a comely bunch       [Chevalier ]

Whose names I had forgot       [Helen of Troy ]

We set to sea at half-past four       [Chevalier ]

Before the tide came in       [Hillbeck ]

And spurned by Lloyd's, as guarantor,       [Helen Owly ]

We saved each other's skin       [loaf ]

Soon symbiosis ran aground       [Kansas Sam ]

Osmosis took its toll       [loaf ]

In halitosis all were drowned       [Helen Owly ]

And Kafka ate my soul       [loaf ]


Contributors: Kevin Andrew Murphy, loaf, Helen Owly, Apsley, (trad), Nym, Arnold the Sly Ape, Chevalier, Kansas Sam, from KAM, a priori, Helen of Troy, Hillbeck.
Poem finished: 28th July 2006 by Chevalier.